Monday, January 30, 2012

Jesus Wept

It was only a matter of days ago, that I told a colleague of mine, that it was almost time for a vacation. "I can always tell when it's time," I said, " when I cry after seeing clients."
Last week I did some crying, tearing up, weeping.
I've always thought it a sign of weakness. Could be the Mennonite in me....or possibly the Friesen in me, but whatever the cause, to me, it was a negative response.
Today I was doing some studying for an upcoming class when I read, once again, the story of Lazarus and Jesus. As I was reading.....for the first time....I could sense.....the reality of the situation. Taking a step back and seeing the panoramic view of that day, I discover a man who  was probably  weary and  tired, who had walked all day to get there, very likely hot and dusty.....he was with a bunch of guys, who just weren't 'picking up what he was putting down'.  I see a man who finally arrives at his destination only to be met and questioned by loved ones, whose grief is all consuming. "If onlys" were uttered, hearts were broken and more tears were shed.
And Jesus wept.
The Bible is not clear as to why he wept, just that he wept.
And in that moment, his humanity became clear to me. Maybe he was tired. Done. Maybe he just wanted to get this whole thing over with. Following the will of God is not an easy task, ask anyone who's tried it. It often involves weeping. Sharing truth with people who do not understand God's plan for them is challenging. It often involves weeping. Watching people make bad decisions as you try and love them unconditionally is draining. It often involves weeping. Seeing people who do not understand that Jesus loves them so much, that he will trade his life for theirs is heart breaking. It involves weeping.
And....even in the face of a joyous reunion, there has been sacrifice. Weeping.
In no way am I comparing myself to Jesus in this moment, but what hope it gives me to know that....just like me, Jesus wept.


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