Saturday, July 31, 2010

Now Boarding.

Here I sit. It's late and I'm staring out the window at the lights of
Calgary. My flight was delayed by 2 hours. I am tired and emotional,
and pondering what God has in store. Twelve years ago I ended up in
Saskatoon, somewhat against my will. Struggling to obtain my green
card, and a father with a significant medical diagnosis brought me to
this place. At that point, it felt like God was in the driver's seat, I was in the passengers seat, and when  we got to Saskatoon, he reached past me, opened my door, and pushed me out. (yes, the car had stopped moving) I never thought that twelve years would go by.
Although I didn't foresee returning to Ontario, a business trip
took me home a year and a half ago, and my heart began to soften. It
has continued to do so.
And so here I sit, on my way home from a week of vacation in Cambridge, where, for the first time in a long
time, I felt at home.
They say hind sight is 20/20,and looking back, I would have to be
blind to not see God's hand in this.
And so as I watch my plane start to board, I wonder. Where will I end up, Where will I go? How will this play out? Don't get me wrong......I still struggle with doubt at times, but choosing to trust is something I decided to do, through it all. Hold things loosely in my hands, and wait for God to open doors, and push me through them.

1 comment:

  1. Praying for you... you know, I think He has carried you gently to those places... lovingly allowing you to need to trust Him for everything...pushing seems harsh, He has never let go or you, you are save in His arms !!!

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