Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Are You there God, Its me....Robyn

I know, I know, if you grew up when I did, you know that the name is supposed to be Margaret. It was a good book, in its time.....but sometimes the question is still the same.

I've been thinking about where God has taken me this past year, and I have not ended up where I assumed He would take me. ...wouldnt you know it......never assume.
Since Easter, I have sat in limbo, trying to figure out what God is saying.....and I cant seem to get it. I had the nerve up this week to go somewhere, where I knew God would be tonite....but by 5:30pm, I chickened out. Go figure.
I am trying to live by faith......'staying in what I know' but one gets tired in that.
When will God change things for me. I am not saying that I am sitting back waiting for Him to do all the work....I am just freakin asking for some direction......I am so tired of being the only one around me, who's life stays the same....people get married, they move, they have children....my life....stays the same....."But you've grown so much spiritually," says my mom......well, FANTASTIC, that's not really something to talk about when old friends call, and always ask....so "what's new?"
"Well I am at the same job, not singing, not married, not dating.......but I've grown so much spiritually."
Well la de freakin dah.
In an attempt to be firm in my faith...I am memorizing Hebrews 11. I should be encouraged by their faith...but the verses that always choke me, are the ones that tell of how all these people never received what they had hoped for...but waited in faith anyway.
I am not bitter.
Just.................................

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